TV Finales

I’m waiting for tech support for my new Blackberry right now (don’t ask), so I thought I’d comment on some of the season/series finales for some of my favorite shows. Why? Because, as you’ve probably already guessed, I love commenting on things and I love lists. So there ya go.

Smallville: Upside–Introduction of Bizarro. We could, FINALLY, have a real super hero battle on our hands. Downside–They promised a series regular would die. Instead we have two or three that might be dead. That’s not the same thing. I’ve still got my fingers crossed for Lana to take that sweet dirt nap!

Supernatural: Upside–This is a great example of how to draw a storyline to a close while setting up next season’s recurring dilemna. Downside–I think we’ve seen the last of Winchester, Sr.

Gilmore Girls: Upside–I already talked about this one. Great ending. Not bowing to the need to sum up absolutely every plotline into a tidy package with a (pink, let’s admit it) bow. Downside–the obvious–no more Gilmore Girls! Aargh!

Veronica Mars: Upside–great writing, great story, great acting. Is there anything about this show that isn’t great? Downside–and this is the biggest suckfest of the month–no more Veronica! The decision to cancel it came so late, there was no time to write a proper series finale. So in all likelihood we’ll never actually know who won the race for sheriff, or if Keith Mars survives the indictment for spiking evidence to save Veronica. Is this cool with anyone? Once again, television executives make it onto my “Career people I want to punch on the street regardless of what shows they represent” list.

Jericho: Upside–taut storyline, good cliffhanger ending. Will Jake and a post-apocolyptic Jericho surrender to their invading neighbors? Jake says “Nuts!” Downside: Yet again, we’ll never know. Lots of fans across the country (making creative us of an online nut company) have registered disapproval at this show’s cancellation. What can I add, except this: If a network can pull a new show so easily, it makes me less and less likely to try out any of their other new shows. Are you listening, TV Executives? I don’t want to punch you!

Bones: Upside–fun chemistry with the characters. Not every finale has to be earth shattering, right? Downside–final minutes with Angela and that curly haired dude’s wedding seem awful derivative, and therefore dumb. Oh well.

Lost: Upside–now this is how you do cliffhanger endings! Not only did we get answers (Charlie) but perhaps a whole new paradigm for the show that doesn’t feel like a shark jump! I love the fact that I’m suddenly trying to figure this show out again. Downside–Charlie. Or is he really going to stay down there?

Scrubs–Upside–It was funny. Modestly interesting cliffhanger. Downside–Let’s face it, this season was a disaster. It’s the ‘miss’ of what I thought was a can’t miss show. Please let next year be better.

Heroes–Upside: Another great example of tying up storylines in a way that leaves fans satisfied while making you want to come back for next season. And they didn’t kill Sylar! Good! Downside: I like this show a lot. But I don’t love it. Sometimes the writing seems a little weak to me (don’t throw stuff at your computer screen as you read this–it’s just the messenger).

24–I’ll have to let you know later. Darcy and I have been taping the epys and have only now started watching it. Good so far! If you comment on this and blow the ending I will find you.

I think that’s it.  So what now?  That’s easy–I’m going to Netflix The Office and maybe Dr. Who over the summer, and maybe The 4400.  And I’ll catch Eureka on SciFi.  I love TV!

Pirates 3 Sucked Awesomeness!

Was Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End a good movie?  I am usually of two minds on things, and this was no exception.  Thus, I’ll give you a peek.  My divided psyche is represented by Cerebral Brent (CB) and Not-so Cerebral Brent (NSCB):

Cerebral: What the heck was this even about?  There were, like, twenty storylines, only a third of which even got resolved!

Not-So: Yeah, but, dude, it’s ’bout pirates!

CB: But there were about three times more characters than we needed!  It was hard to keep track!

NSCB: But, check it, one of ‘em had an octopus for a face!  How cool is that?!

CB: You’d think they’d be able to straighten everything out in 2 and 3/4 hours!  But no, it just got more and more convoluted!

NSCB: But they had swords and stuff! And also guns! And stuff!

CB: The ending was soooo long in coming!

NSCB: Yeah, but it was actually kinda sad and sweet.

CB: This movie typifies everything that’s wrong with the studio system of making movies, with an over-reliance on special effects and a bloated budget that leaves audiences hollow!

NSCB: Aaarh, ye be wastin’ yer breath, bilge rat! Hey, it’s fun to talk pirate-y!

CB: What is wrong with you?!  You need to expect more from your summer entertainment!

NSCB: Dude, it’s a movie about pirates!  What more do you want? And so what if it was almost 3 hours?  For *&^^% $9.25 they outta let me stay overnight!

CB: That’s it!  I can’t have a meaningful conversation with you any more!

NSCB: Yeah? Well, you’re ugly.

Who wins!  With a TKO, it’s Not-So-Cerebral Brent!  Thus, I give it my hearty thumbs up! And that’s our show for tonight!

I’m better now.

Owing to my two ongoing needs to a) self assess and b) make lists, here’s what I learned in the week I was sick:

• Marvel Ultimate Alliance is a fun game, but the motion-sensitive Wii remote makes me look like I’m epileptic.
• Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner? is a good movie if a little preachy at the end.
• The Queen is a great movie with no villain.
• Enter the Dragon is still cool.
• The Blues Brothers is funnier than I remembered it. My favorite line this time: “Those men are offensive…smelling. I mean they smell… bad.”
• Bad Santa is a funny and mostly guilt free if you watch it on TV.
• Pirates of the Caribbean 2 is still fun.
• Risky Business isn’t a comedy. I was floored by this.
• This is Spinal Tap is still really funny.
• The Truth about Charlie, a remake of the classic Charade, is worthless.
• My VCR is broken (after 13 valiant years of service) and Best Buy doesn’t even sell them any more.
• If I’m sick, I feel I have an unrepentant license to slack (this is more of a rediscovering).
• Being sick doesn’t keep me from enjoying free lunch, especially if it’s BBQ.

I’m sick.

Have been for about three days.  A pretty bad cold.  It’s horrible–I’ve had to skip work and stay at home, with nothing to do but sit around, watch movies and TV, read comic books, play Nintendo, take long naps, and…wait, wait, I think I might be sick tomorrow too!

Yay! Horrible Staff Meetings are Back!

I’m currently stuck in a 3-hour staff meeting, in which we’re briefing a new person on our team. In other words, we’re covering stuff I already know. Which leads me to conclude:

Staff meeting is like waking up and realizing you’re in the studio audience of a live taping of The View, covering today’s topic–”Why Breathing is Good.”

13 Seconds of Dark Blue

This worthy James Ellroy story has his old standbys–bad cops looking for redemption as their world goes up in flames. The ending feels familiar, but it’s a viceral punch reliving the ‘92 LA Riots, exploding in the faces of its unwitting architects. 3 out of 5 ticktocks.

Goodbye Gilmore Girls!

I stand on the rooftops of America and declare–I am a heterosexual male Gilmore Girls Fan!  And just a few minutes ago, I said goodbye to Lorelei and Rory forever.  The seventh season of GG wrapped up with a happy but bittersweet ending.  I’m sorry to see them go, but it’s actually heartwarming to think that there’s a place called Stars Hollow, Connecticut, with a cast of zany and lovable characters that will be there, entrenched in the public’s imagination, where no unkind thought or deed can ever enter.

13 Seconds of F/X

My first rated R movie ever was cool then–*sigh*. Some fun stuff, though, like Brian Dennehy and creative uses for superglue. Life lesson–if you’re on the lam, driving an RV with “F/X” painted on it apparently constitutes lying low. 2 out of 5 ticktocks.

13 Seconds of Sleeper

I’m trying a new category today. A while ago it occured to me that I like talking about movies on this blog, but invariably I end up typing up three or four paragraphs, which is probably too long for most of you to care, and actually rather daunting for me to write. So here’s what I’m going to do–when I see a movie, I’ll write a review. If you read it aloud, it will take you 13 seconds to get through it all. I’ll also rank it on a scale of 1 to 5. If I want to say more about it, I’ll just write a regular review. Sound good? Let’s start with my first 13 second review–Sleeper.

A Woody Allen movie from back in the early ’70s, it’s about a guy who’s been frozen and revived in a totalitarian future. More zany than clever, but still lots of Allen’s whiny one-liners. Fun if you’re bored. 3 out of 5 ticktocks.

Let’s put Death and the Maiden to rest

I gave a short synopsis on the movie Death and the Maiden (it’s also under the Movies category) and mentioned that I’d comment further on it, as it reminded me of Kosmo Kramer and the Road Warrior. That was my way of being cleverly cryptic. Ahem.

Oh, and since I’ve got spoilers coming up, if you want to see the movie, go ahead, and then come back. Okay, there you are.  Let’s get going.

At the end of the movie, the meek doctor played by Ben Kingsley admits that he did, in fact, torture Sigourney Weaver’s character. That he, in fact, liked it. He admits this in a way that makes us think he’s as shocked by the confession as we are.

Now, here’s what got me thinking. Remember the fun tirades we as a nation were subjected to by Mel Gibson and Michael Richards last year? And, similarly, Don Imus? Each one has, in his own way, come out and done the elaborate apologetic two-step that characterizes celebrity penance in the 21st century. What’s so interesting to me is the core tenet of their respective apologies–”I’m sorry I did that. And I dont’ know why I did it, because that’s just not me.“

Now I find that kind of funny. I don’t blame them for being taken aback by their own racism. Who woudn’t be? Racism is about the worst thing you can accuse someone of today. But in the case of Mel & Mike, where do they think their utterances came from? Government mind control? The Body Snatchers? The ugly truth is, it came from down inside, somewhere that they didn’t know about, but evidence shows is alive and well. Just like the doctor in DatM, they cringe at what they’re capable of, but they’re capable nonetheless.

But what about the rest of us? The outcry against these celebrities was quick, harsh, fully warranted and, frankly, probably pretty hypocritical. Can we say we’ve beaten those lesser angels of our nature, when they obviously haven’t? In other words, while I’m sure 99% of us would loudly defend our own honor against a charge of racism (or anything else for that matter), how do we know? There are times I think about what’s down deep in me, and I’m a little afraid.

In the end, I think it’s another affirmation that God is really good to us. I like to think I’m a swell guy, but He knows I need Him to save me as much now as I ever did. Thankfully, He does know what’s down there. Maybe I’ll never have to find out. If only we were all so lucky.